struggle

i know i haven't been posting much lately. i have a LIST of things to write about but i've been half lazy and half struggling with how much to write.

there's a BIG topic i want to talk about but i keep battling with how much is too much to throw out there- coming from me i'm sure that's a little strange to hear. it's more along an "airing dirty laundry" line than an embarrassing TMI line. half of me believes that there's healing in getting my side of the story out, and half of me doesn't want my hardest issue out on the web for anyone to run across.

i keep trying to think of a tactful way to cover the issue but the truth can't be half assed or sugar coated so i think i just need to moxy up and throw it out.

in the mean time there's a few random things to throw out there. i'll start kicking my own ass and making myself sit down to write more regularly- there's nothing on the DIY network that won't be aired again later (yes, i'm currently addicted to home improvement shows).

what say you? do you think there's anything that's too personal to share? i've always believed that if it can help one person then there's not...but on this one i'm really questioning that.

do i stick to my guns? share my story no matter how potentially uncomfortable it may make me? edit it? i'm lost on this one...

sexy vs. NOT sexy

you guys. there’s something that’s been bothering me for a while. and i need to say something:

it seems that fewer and fewer men know what’s sexy these days. this is a disturbing trend. and one i need to do my part to correct ASAP. especially before VEGAS. because i’m sure out there somewhere is a man who has never heard of me, and will never read this blog, that i will meet up with in a club there, and he will need to know this information. somehow. so. maybe just putting it out in the universe will solve that. it will magically find his way to him, and he will already know what’s sexy and what is not sexy.

so. here it is. in stark detail. things that are sexy and things that are NOT sexy. and. *sigh* as per usual. these things were all learned by experience. the things i’ve suffered. tragic really.

SEXY: kissing. with the full tongue action. and MAYBE a little lick of the lip or two.

NOT SEXY: holding my head and doing an extensive cavity search of my mouth with your tongue. there is NO reason for you to lick my gums. all the way around my mouth. especially while holding my head still so i can’t get away. i just threw up a little.

SEXY: kissing the tip of my nose. or eskimo kisses. or resting our foreheads together with our noses touching.

NOT SEXY: licking the inside of my nose. ‘nuff said. and i just threw up a little again.

with all this throwing up i’ll fit into my vegas dresses no problem.

SEXY: a “bedtime” snack like popcicles. or ice cream. or strawberries.

NOT SEXY: bbq corn nuts.

SEXY: Ralph Lauren Polo Black. panties: dropped. IN SMALL DOSES. as in A, SINGULAR, ONE spritz or two.

NOT SEXY: mixing your cologne with your body wash. and your shampoo. and using it as a deodorant. and a few extra sprays for good measure. if i can smell you before i see you it is NOT a good thing.

SEXY: dirty dancing.

NOT SEXY: making it look like we’re having sex on the dance floor. EVERYONE should be able to see both your hands. AT ALL TIMES.

SEXY: drunken sex.

NOT SEXY: drunken anal.

and on that TMI, i think that’s enough for now.

by the way…have i mentioned I’M GOING TO VEGAS?!?!?