and then??

well, first the good news: made it to vegas and back! no marriages, no bail money, no close encounters of the strange kind. just a whole ton of good, not so clean fun! i would discuss more details, but there may or may not have been a blood sisters wolf pack pact somewhere along the lines…

suffice to say, TONS of pictures were taken, and no, you can’t see any of them. THAT’S how it went.

i will say one thing: hardest part about coming home? leaving the heated toilet seat behind. seriously people. a HEATED toilet seat. talk about peeing in comfort.

so, that was the hardest part about coming home. hardest part about arriving home? having to go from vegas to mom in 3.2 seconds. walked in my house and the kitchen was a MESS, living room was a tornado, and the kids bedroom floor no longer exists. even my bed was a mess, sheets all over the place. *sigh* straight from maid service back to being the maid. i suppose that’s a normal part of vacations, but since this was my first (yes, ever) i guess i was expecting a little bit of the magic to carry over at least a little bit.

now on to the big news:

i’m thinking about quitting my job. or going to part time. or taking a leave of absence if possible. just something different. don’t get me wrong- i have a good job. i like the people, the work is easy, there’s nothing BAD about it at all. i just feel like it’s time for a change, and for the first time i’m in a position where i can make that change and have a safety cushion behind me. i’ve been here for 10 years already and just feel stuck. pushing the same papers i was 10 years ago…and nothing different in the near future. it feels like i’m not using any of my skills, let alone using them to the best of my abilities. i need something that challenges me and makes me think and pushes me a bit. and you know…i’m only 30. that means i have 35 years until i qualify for retirement. so that’s PLENTY of time to start a different career.

the more i think about it, the more comfortable i am with this decision. it would mean time to try my hand at writing, time to be in the kids classrooms, time to work out, time to be a real mom and cook dinners and keep the house clean, time to do more glass work, just TIME in general. no more feeling like i get up just in time for work, sit at a desk all day, slap together dinner, shove the kids in bed just to do it all over again the next day. it would be nice to have real time with my kids instead of just 2-3 hours a night before bedtime. it would be nice to learn how to really cook meals instead of piecing together whatever i can find at the last minute. it would be nice to have time to go to a gym. just all of it. it would be nice to have a change. and i can do it right now. not forever, but for a year at least. see what it’s like. see how it goes. if anything, i’ve learned that a year is a fuck long time. so much can change and happen.

i’m not 100% sure on this one, but i’m pegging in at about 90% right now. it would be a HUGE change, but i’m ready for that. and why not do it? you know? why sit around thinking about it and wondering “what if?” why not just jump and see what happens?

so. yeah. that’s where i’m at right now. what do ya’ll think?