Friday, July 6, 2018

a short (hopefully) rant

it's been a rough few weeks with the teenager.

really rough.

out of desperation i decided to look for single parent support groups on facebook.

yeah.

it's been that bad.

i've already noticed a trend the last...LOT...of years- all the "parenting" content on the internet stops as soon as kids hit around 7-10.

like parents should have it all figured out by then and never need support again.

well, i'm a fucking hot mess and i STILL need support.

i dug through PLENTY of single parent groups on facebook and finally found one that sounded ok. i couldn't see much because it's a private group, but the description and the rules seemed like things would be pretty dialed in...so i requested to join.

then 5 minutes later i left the group.

"i've been single for 2 months, can i start dating again?"

"husband left a week ago..."

"my 3 week old..."


*maybe* 3 posts scrolling WAY back about teenagers...one her daughter was distraught at getting less than an A on a test, one was celebrating how well her teenager was doing after graduation, and ONE had issues about their 19 year old who had just graduated having a hard time deciding if he wanted to live with mom or dad after high school.

and i don't discount those issues. each family has their own dynamic.

BUT.

am i a fucking unicorn?

where's the parents that have been single for twenty years?

where's the parents dealing with a teenager that just stole $100 worth of weed and will lie in the face of every. single. fact?

the mom struggling because she had to call the police when her teenager threatened physical harm for having a cell phone taken?

am i just a shitty parent?

does everyone else have it figured out by the time they've been a parent this long?

you think i'd know how to good cop AND bad cop by now, but NOPE. just one rabbid bad cop that INSISTS on being heard, which we all know teenagers are sooooooo good at doing.

just a bad cop that feels like she's having a stroke on the daily because the stress and tension waiting for the next fight no matter how hard she tries to avoid one.

and i can tell when i'm going crazy. i can tell when a rational person would tap out and just leave things alone...but holy. fuck. cheese. on. a. cracker. how do you walk away from "yeah, whatever" *door slam* without popping a gasket?

and that's just the parenting part.

the single part??

where's the other parents that can't date because their kid HATES everyone and makes life a living hell when anyone comes over?

where's the other parents who's kids are openly homophobic so dating same sex is COMPLETELY out of the question?

where's the other parents that just want some help but could NEVER, EVER imagine asking someone to be willing to share in the stress and chaos that is a teenager.

logically i know i can't be the only one.

but fuck, it sure feels that way.